So whats new? Well, nothing much. I think the rain finally stopped after something like 64 consecutive days, which is a minor improvement. At least we haven't got the floods like the UK!
I am finishing my job in exactly one month, yipee!!! And then two weeks later Im off to med school. It feels really surreal, because I don't really believe that I'm actually going to train to be a doctor yet....but its getting closer and closer. It been a strange summer, without any holidays away, and I kinda wish I hadn't just worked for all of it. Soon it will be the dreaded winter again...... I just really hope I like my course enough not to mind!
So many things to do that I have been ignoring. Haven't bought flights over, don't know where I'm living, and haven't even thought about what to pack! Oh dear......
Its very strange, but it just so happens that basically all my friends are also moving away this year. I think its due to the ERASMUS effect, but its kinda weird, we're all preparing to emigrate at the same time. Except that I'll be gone for a lot longer of course....
I've been thinking an awful lot about medicine recently (well surprise surprise you say) , and not in a good way, but I blame it on the the job. I think I'm getting jaded and bitter, and I haven't even started yet ffs! We just get so much shit from people, and none of them seem to appreciate anything we do, it makes me wonder what being the actual doctor will be like. I hope that getting to treat will make the difference. I used to wonder how doctors could become so cynical and hardened, but now I completely get it. I just really hope that I can maintain enough of my enthusiasm not to be one of them. And sometimes I wonder if I'm making the right decision. Medicine takes you over, you basically sign away your life the minute you enrol, and sometimes I think that maybe I should consider doing something a little lighter, with less demands and responsibility. I wonder all the time if I'm up to the job.
But at the same time, I can't think of anything else I want to do. Veterinary is definitely out at this point I think. Do any of the other medstudents out there feel like this? Ugh, I blame the lack of sunlight on all this negativity.
Also, it seems that a lot of our patients have been quite ill (for once). Brain tumours, breast cancer, paranoid schizophrenia, ms, HIV, you name it, we got it! And its quite sad. It always seem to happen to the nice people too; why is life such a bitch like that?
As you can see, all joy and light here. Its a long weekend I should be happy!
Oh, and my own body is deciding to f**k me over at the moment. Now I've had chondromalacia patella for the last say 6 years, and it just gets worse and worse. I went to see a consultant, he was a lovely man, but he said "this is the most common knee disorder I see, we don't really know what causes it and there is basically nothing we can do to treat it, you can try the exercises, some people find it gives them some relief from the pain, but not everyone, and there is no cure".
If I'm lucky I'll grow out of it. The one thing that really has helped are MBT's, they've made life bearable. Before I got them I was at my wits end. So if you have C.P, GO AND BUY A PAIR NOW!!! Seriously. They are incredibly ugly and expensive, but they are worth it a thousand times over.
But anyway, last 4 days for a reason unknown to me my left knee has been v swollen and painful, and then of course the pain travelled to my hip. I don't know why it does this, Im guessing some shared nerve pathway or something, but either way, when it does, I'm seriously sore. Sitting hurts, standing hurts, walking hurts, everything hurts!!!! And I know that there are people much worse off, with terrible incurable conditions, I know! But I'm only 19, and I feel like I have the joints of a 90 yr old. My granny is more limber than me. And no one can tell me why, and none of the fookin dr's will give me pain relief!!!! I just want to function!!!! Anyway, I'm going to the doc on wed, lets pray I get some anti-inflammatories this time. Not just the old "take paracetamol(acetaminophen)" IT DOESN'T WORK!!!!!
So that's my moan. And there's lots of it! Apologies to all.
Someone tell me something happy, please!
3 comments:
Sucks about the knee.
Happy news: You're working as a medical secretary aren't you? I've heard many people say that it's far worse to work the front desk of a doctor's office than it is to be the doctor. So take heart, it will get better!
You really don't miss vet med at all? I like human medicine a lot more than vet med, but I miss the clinical skills and surgeries so much!
I only did 6 months --- it was the equivalent of a rotation rather than official vet school so I didn't have to do sheep anatomy or anything.
I mostly followed the vets around, but I got to help out in surgery sometimes (suturing!! yay!!), and I got to see a ton of really interesting cases. I learned stuff like how to calculate dosages of meds and IV fluids, monitor anaesthesia, give SQ injections, help with cannulating and blood draws, read x-rays, etc.
It's really the surgeries that I miss most, but I want to have human patients :)
Post a Comment